Typical Situation

Well, this past week as many of you know has been about the roughest week of my life. And if life can get any rougher then this then I am effed. 

My brothers fiancee died on Tuesday morning. Probably the worst news I have heard in my life.  I mean seriously? Things were just getting back to normal then you throw this shit at me? Life was getting back on track and understandable. But now she is gone and can’t be brought back and all I can do along with our families is more forward.

So Friday was her service, which was once again the hardest day I have experienced in my life. But then my family goes home my brother starts to think about moving forward and on, and we wake up to another tragedy. 

My brothers best friend since the age of 2 and a friend on mine since the age of 6 died together in a motorcycle accident at around 3am. this morning. I mean if life couldn’t get any worse.

I was with a friend for the last time before he goes back to college, we were just about to eat lunch together and I check my phone and find this shit out. I mean I just wanted to spend time with him. I just wanted to be with him, because chances are we are said and done. And I don’t want that in any way shape or sort. 

I really like him. I really really do. And we just can’t make it work anymore. There is nothing for us to do to make it work. And I was just getting to know him and understand him and how he functions. We were just getting close and now he pushes away. Yeah we had intimate times, but who the fuck doesn’t. Sorry I am a fucking sinner sorry I make mistakes.

I miss you Matthew Hilker, Jamie Barry, and most of all Brandy Duquesne. May you all RIP and live in eternal glory with the Father above.

And, to Ben. You are my favorite mistake… And I love you for it. I want to be yours forever.